Taichi's Dream World
by Crysie
Summary: Enter Tai's Dream World, where reality isn't what it seems. Everything Tai wishes, he gets, even if it means he forgets his life as he knew it. Now, three years later, what happens when this oh-so-perfect world begins to faulter? Taito!! Angst! *FINISHED
1. Dream World

taichidreamworld

Disclaimer: I don't own digimon. Enough said?  
  
Yay, another weird fic from me. Um, all I have to say is this fic is pretty... different. I guess that's how I can put it. I had fun writing this, and oh, and please review.  
  
However, this plot does follow 02. But, I just didn't have the stupid epilogue part, cause I didn't want _my_ Matt stuck with Sora. Ahem, there isn't any bashing in this of anyone.  
  
Taichi's Dream World  
By Crysie  
  
**~**  
  
He was always a strange child, everyone knew it. When he was young, just a little boy, he claimed to see monsters. But as time went on, he forgot about it. That was until he was pulled into the world where these supposed lived, and as time grew on, he was known as a Digidestined, who once ––oh no, twice–– saved the world with his friends.  
  
But did his eerie destiny go beyond that? Yes.  
  
**~**  
  
The night gave a chilling downcast, causing Taichi to shiver. But this was the usual, and he didn't mind. Not when he was safe and happy in his lover's arms.   
  
It was his idea, after all. He wanted to venture outside with his love and make sweet, blissful love to him. And that's what he did.   
  
Now contently he rested, but was still feeling chilled to the bone, though his lover's body was as warm as could be. He snuggled closer, and automatically an arm wrapped around his thin body that would be more built if he took the time to eat more than three measly meals a day. But that's how it had to be.  
  
He could never go back. Never. In fact, he had forgotten about his home, his life and the everyday world. In his mind, this was life: sleeping under the stars with his lover next to him. And now, this was home.  
  
He had a beautiful mansion that he shared with his love, with balconies overlooking each room that had a window; a front lawn that was twice as long as a football stadium, and even more of a luscious green; a front door that had a welcome mat placed below, though there was never a single guest to welcome; and behind the house, his own soccer field stretched across, with a swimming pool next to it, so that after he and his lover played a few games of one on one, they could take a cool dip. Inside of the forsaken ––(for the two occupants hardly ever went inside)––house was more elaborate than the exterior with more rooms than were needed by the two owners; a kitchen that always had fresh food baking, and when the pair were hungry, inside they went to munch on anything their hearts desired; and even had a lounging room that on certain occasions was occupied, but only if Taichi and his love were too tired to walk outside.  
  
Everything was perfect, Taichi's life that is. His beautiful Yamato was asleep in his arms and would never leave him. Never. For they lived in this forsaken world together, and only together. There were no other in habitants, nobody to tell them they couldn't love one another, and certainly nobody to tell them to go home.  
  
For they would never leave. Not unless one of them remembers their past. But how? One was brainwashed in believing this is normal while the other... The other is the cause of this. This world that isn't real––there's no life, no true feelings. Well, the feelings may be real because Yamato and Taichi love each other, they really do, but it isn't a realistic place where they love each other. They aren't in their world anymore.  
  
They are in Taichi's Dream World. His mind left his body and now was living in this world. And one day, his body disappeared from the earth, with Yamato's soon following, for that was Taichi's dream. It couldn't be undone, and though everyone wondered where the pair disappeared to, they went on with their lives because their was no other way, no explanation to anything.  
  
Yamato didn't know of this power his beloved Taichi had. All he knew––or used to know before being brainwashed––was that nobody approved of their relationship. Not even his own brother. And when his mind and soul left his body to the world that came from Taichi's imagination, he lost all memory of his once home, back on Earth.  
  
Not even Taichi knew of his power. He didn't know where it came from, no doubt because he didn't know he had it! All he knew was that things were going his way, and it seemed to Taichi that it had been like that forever, thus, forgetting a time when everyone looked down upon him and his love. And for this, he was grateful, though he would never know where that feeling came from because of the memory loss.  
  
Maybe it was Taichi's mind that pleaded to forget everything, and to only remember the world where he and his precious Yamato lived happily in freedom. And in this world, it was possible for his wish to come true, so that he and Yamato Ishida could live happily ever after.  
  
Forever... Right?  
  
**~**  
  
A yawn escaped the brunette's lips and he stretched, also sending a smack to Yamato.  
  
Ow, what was that for?  
  
I'm sorry! Taichi panicked, for he hated when his Yamato was hurt, though that rarely happened and it was hard to actually call this painful. It was only an accident, a smack on the shoulder by Taichi... It wasn't that big of a deal. Right? Wrong.  
  
It's okay––  
  
No, no it's not! And without Taichi realizing, his wish for this not to happen occurred, and moments later, neither male remembered anything of the last few minutes; and the small disappeared from Yamato's left shoulder, not leaving any trace of a knuckle or a bruise.  
  
Boy, I had a good sleep. Did you, precious?  
  
The blonde smiled. Yes I did. I'm hungry. Why don't we see what there is to eat?  
  
And off they went on their half an hour trek to the house. And when arriving, Taichi simply wished––without even conscious––that their would be a grand feat spread on the long table when they reached the kitchen. And of course, it was there.  
  
A simple conversation arose, or it usually took place. Even though they had been in that world for more than three years, they always seemed to have something to talk about, even if it was as simple as a small butterfly Yamato saw. And again, without even realizing it, Taichi was responsible for that. For sometimes his heart peered into what Yamato's desired, and if it was to see life be born, then so be it.  
  
I had a strange dream last night, Taichi.  
  
Oh. What did you dream of, my pet?  
  
It was strange. I was inside a dim room and someone was calling my name, only I couldn't see them. And when I did, it was someone strange. It was a boy with blonde hair, someone I have never seen before.  
  
Silly! Don't you remember that you have blonde hair?  
  
Oh... Oh yeah, right.  
  
There were no mirrors in the luxurious mansion. Neither Taichi or Yamato desired to see what they looked like, for the other would always tell how beautiful he was. So as it stands, they basically don't know what they look like.  
  
Maybe you saw an image of yourself.  
  
I guess.  
  
**~**  
  
Over the next few weeks, these dreams because more vivid. And now even Taichi had them! he saw a young girl with brown hair and eyes, calling his name over and over again. One night he even saw a boy with blonde hair and blue eyes, almost identical to his love. They were holding each other, crying softly. Taichi didn't know what to make of these dreams. What did he do?  
  
Everyday when he woke up, he wished that he could forget them, and he and his precious Yamato did.  
  
Except one morning.  
  
It was cold. Usually Taichi had it so that it would never be too cold, but for some odd reason, it was freezing. He glanced at his naked lover, seeing him shiver too. Immediately a blanket draped over them. But something was strange...  
  
The pair jumped up, shaking the blanket off. All Taichi could think was: cold! The blanket was cold, mainly because it was sopping wet. Why did that happen? Everything was supposed to be perfect! Why would a wet blanket appear, instead of a nice warm one that he requested? This annoyed Taichi, very much.  
  
That was an interesting start to the day, the blonde inquired, beginning to get dressed.  
  
A little too interesting.  
  
I had another dream. It was strange. This time there wasn't only a blonde, but a brunette as well. She was calling your name while the boy was calling me. Then there was this red head. She was trying to comfort the girl and boy, but couldn't do anything. Finally, a boy who looks very similar to you, and even had these circular goggles that reminded me of something... Anyway, the red head reminded me of someone, as if I knew her before. He laughed softly. As if it were in another life time or something.  
  
I had a similar dream, said Taichi. Subconsciously, he wished the peace-breaking dreams away, but something else happened.  
  
Yamato's eyes flickered a strange color.   
  
  
  
Suddenly they went back to normal ––or what Taichi thought was normal. What were we talking about? Oh yeah, my dream. It was very interesting. I had this strange urge to... to... I can't remember. Don't you hate when you forget something you wanted to do as soon as you wake up in the morning?  
  
Oh. Yeah, said Taichi, frowning.  
  
**~**  
  
Even more weeks passed by with more mishaps. They were as simple as food not tasting right to them not forgetting their dreams anymore. One day, the stairs leading upstairs were missing! It was a strange sight. The stairs reappeared a few minutes later, and luckily, the pair forgot about it.  
  
The dreams were beginning to cause Taichi to wake up every night. His dreams seemed to be worse than Yamato's, though before it was the other way around. He, too, dreamed of all those people, but now a man with blue hair and another with fiery red came into the dream. Taichi wasn't happy. He wasn't at all.  
  
He glanced at Yamato, who was walking next to him, deep in thought. he had a confused look on his face, as if he were trying to figure something out. But he just couldn't. Taichi wanted him to stop thinking, he wanted Yamato to be pondering over a butterfly or stare at a rock, but he wasn't doing that lately. Instead, he would ponder over the strange dreams endlessly, and Taichi tried to not be upset. When he did get upset, the pair would usually forget anyway.  
  
Taichi still had some control.  
  
You now what? That red head... I know her for somewhere. I think I knew her once.  
  
That's preposterous. You couldn't have. We've lived here all of our lives.  
  
asked the blonde quietly. Why can't I remember forever, though? There are strange gaps.  
  
He hated the sadness in Yamato's voice, hated it with everything he had. Instantly, a small wish to make Yamato happy came into mind, and suddenly, Yamato stopped walking. Taichi glanced back, eying him. Boring into his eyes, they did that strange flicker again, a different blue coming into view.  
  
Sora?! T.K.!  
  
They changed again, back to the usual dark blue. He smiled at his love. Come Taichi, I'm hungry.  
  
Taichi hated hearing those names, but didn't think anymore of it. For as they came towards the house... There was no house there! It was gone. He could see the front lawn, but a large space was empty, and stretching beyond that was their soccer field and swimming pool.  
  
Where's the mansion? asked Yamato, his voice a touch shaky.  
  
I don't know, Taichi stammered. Suddenly, a taller mansion flickered into view where the mansion should have been. It was tall, the tallest thing both Taichi and Yamato had ever seen. They had never seen a home so big! Where did it come from? It vanished as quickly as it appeared, and replacing it was their regular mansion.  
  
Let's get something to eat, said the brunette, tugging on Yamato's hand.  
  
**~**  
  
Over the next few days, neither would leave the mansion. Fear––the newest emotion, yet––was what each felt, and leaving the mansion could cause problems. Maybe it would disappear again? Or worse, i could move somewhere else. Neither knew what to think, so they stayed there.  
  
Taichi laid beside his lover, too tired to speak. A faint good night' came from Yamato, but that was the last thing Taichi heard. He fell asleep instantly.  
  
  
  
_Taichi, please come home. I miss you terribly, the brunette said, reading off a piece of paper. I don't know where you went. You or Yamato. Takeru and I miss you guys terribly. We are ashamed of how we reacted to your love. We all miss you. Please come home. I know this letter will never reach you, I know that because I don't even know where you are. But please know that I love you more than anything, I really do.  
  
Suddenly, that redhead girl appeared, soothing the girl. Kari, Tai is mostly likely gone. Maybe him and Matt...  
  
No, they would never commit suicide. Not when they have each other. He's out there, somewhere.  
  
I'm going to see T.K. now, will you be all right alone?  
  
The redhead disappeared, leaving the brunette alone again. She looked at the letter. This letter may never reach you, but it isn't staying in my room any longer.  
  
She went to a window, the only thing visible in the dark room. Loud, strange noises came from outside, and even faint yells were heard. She let it go, and it began to blow away, away forever.  
  
I just hope it finds you. Please find Taichi, she whispered. I want my brother back.  
  
  
  
  
_Taichi sat up, his face in a cold sweat. That girl called him brother! Brother? He didn't have a sister. No. No way. He's been here all of his life. He looked down at his Yamato, smiling. Laying next to him, he instantly fell asleep.  
  
**~**  
  
The next morning, Taichi was the first to wake. He decided to let Yamato sleep. It's not like they were doing anything, anyway.  
  
Stretching, he stood up and began to get dressed. It was strange. Normally fresh clothes just appeared. Today there was nothing. Resolutely, he put on the same clothes as the day before, cursing what was happening. He didn't understand.  
  
He yawned and began to walk to the door. And that's when he noticed it, a piece of paper on the floor. It was flickering, and finally, it just stayed there. Hesitantly, Taichi scooped down and brought it up.  
  
  
  
  
_Dear Taichi,  
  
Taichi, please come home. I miss you terribly. I don't know where you went. You or Yamato...  
  
_  
  
  
Taichi dropped it in shock. It was the same letter from that dream! He wished for it to disappear, vanish from sight. It did nothing of the sort. Suddenly, there were three copies in his hand. Frustrated, he began to rip them apart. When he was satisfied with the size of each ripped piece, he went to the window and let them blow away in the wind, just like that girl did.  
  
As he turned around, he gasped. Hundreds of papers littered the room. He was positive they were more copies of that girl's letters.  
  
No, no, no! he cried out, beginning to rip up each one. But as he ripped one, two more appeared.  
  
Yamato stirred, shaking off the paper that covered him. What's with all of the paper? He took one letter, beginning to read.  
  
All Taichi could do was watch as his boyfriend's eyes flickered to that strange color again... This time, though, they didn't change back. He glanced up.  
  
Why is Kari writing this?  
  
  
  
He looked around, leaping up. Where are we? What's happening? The last thing I remember we were in my room... We just finished making love. I can remember it so clearly. Oh my God, you are so much older! Am I? He began feeling his face.  
  
Taichi stared in confusion at his boyfriend. He didn't understand. Why was Yamato acting like this? What was he talking about? Yamato, what are you talking about? We are at home.  
  
Yamato shook his head. He found a pair of boxers, pulling them on. No, no we aren't. Our home is with T.K. and Kari. They are home! Where are we?  
  
Taichi shook his head, tears falling down his face. I don't understand. Why are you mentioning that strange girl's name? Why?  
  
What's wrong with you, Tai? Yamato came over, enveloping his boyfriend into a hug. I'm remembering more. We were suddenly hear and... and everything was so strange. We were like zombies.  
  
Why are you calling me Tai? My name is Taichi! What are zombies? What are you talking about?  
  
Yamato pulled Taichi away, grasping his shoulders tightly. You aren't back to normal yet! Tai, I need you! Please, remember your sister. Remember Kari! Remember my brother? His name is T.K. Um, Sora! Sora is one of your best friends. I dated her for a while, but then I realized I was gay and we hooked up. Oh God Tai, please, remember!  
  
Taichi pulled away. I wish you would stop all of this nonsense! A wish came...  
  
Instead of forgetting and his eyes returning to their color, a piece of tape covered his mouth. Yamato easily pulled it off. He stared at Taichi, studying everything about him.  
  
It's these wishes, he mumbled. Something about your wishes is triggering something. He walked away, towards a window that overlooked the front lawn. We aren't in our world, but we aren't in the Digital World either. Where are we?  
  
Stop it, please, he begged, beginning to pull on Yamato's hand.  
  
Yamato's eyes softened, but didn't return to normal. Don't be scared, he whispered, gently caressing Taichi's cheek. He paused, and then something in his eyes told Taichi he was thinking of something. Either that, or he was getting more of these strange day dreams. Or Both.  
  
**~**  
  
Another week went by where Taichi's precious Yama was acting strange, not like his self. It hurt him very much. He wanted things to return to the way they were, in his so ever perfect world.  
  
Yamato walked into the room, his eyes portraying worrisome, something Taichi had never seen before. He tried his best to ignore that gaze, tried his best to ignore that his boyfriend wasn't the same anymore.  
  
Hey, are you feeling okay? the blonde asked in a whisper. He took Taichi's hand, rubbing the knuckles with his soft finger tips. Then he gave a light tug on his hand, pulling him into another room where there was a couch. The pair sat down.  
  
I don't ask much out of you, Tai, whispered Yamato, pulling Taichi so that he was sitting on his lap. But I need you to try something for me.  
  
  
  
I want you to take s back to Earth. We need to go back now see Kari and T.K. You know, my brother and your sister.  
  
I don't get what you are saying, said Taichi, moving away from Yamato. I want you to stop doing this to me. There is no one else. And stop calling me Tai, my name is Taichi.  
  
Calm down, please. Just try, for me?  
  
I want you to stop doing this. Taichi looked away, wishing––but not consciously––for Yamato to forgot this idea of another world called Earth.   
  
Suddenly, a cry came from his love, sending his gaze directly towards him. Yamato has his hands covering his head, an attempt to squeeze out whatever it was what was wrong. He cried out again and fell of the couch.  
  
  
  
Tai, stop wishing these things! Please! he cried out again, his lip now bleeding from his teeth sinking into it.   
  
  
  
Call me Matt! That's my nick name. Your nickname is Tai, Hikari's is Kari, Takeru's is T.K., um Jyou's is Joe... Remember them?  
  
No, and stop saying these things. Why are you in pain?  
  
But Yamato didn't stop, still holding his hands over his ears. And you loved soccer. You and Daisuke––Davis for short––played on the same team. And later on, Ken began playing on the same team as you two.  
  
Who? Would you stop already?  
  
Mimi and Sora, two other friends of ours also came to the Digital World with us. Don't you remember?  
  
The Digital what? Stop this, you're in pain. Why are you saying a bunch of meaningless names?  
  
But again, Yamato continued. And when we fell in love and told everyone, they rejected us. I remember coming over and Kari ignored us, she even left. You cried. You cried so much because you loved your sister so much, and yet, she didn't accept us. I remember that.  
  
Taichi stopped, a sudden image playing into his mind.  
  
_A young girl with brown hair––the same girl from the dream––looked upon Yamato with disgust. She snarled, than said something to... Someone. Than the door slammed. The began to cry.  
  
_A cry came from Yamato yet again, but this time it was out of happiness. Than I kissed you. We made love for the first time. But after, you cried again because you wanted everyone to accept us. And you know what? I cried too... Remember me in the Digital World? I hated to cry, especially in front of others. I only allowed _you _to see me cry.  
  
Taichi closed his eyes, allowing another image to creep into his mind.  
  
_Snow was everywhere, something not seen often by the brunette. He was over top of Yamato, but not in a sexual way. He was crying, whispering something about a boy named T.K. Then the cliff they were on began to crack, making them fall...  
  
_We fell, said Taichi, trying to remember more. I was on top of you, you were crying and talking about T.K.  
  
Yamato smiled. That must have been in the Digital World. We used to fight a lot, and I mean a lot. That was the first time I let you see me cry, the first side of a weakness that led to this... To us, and to _this._  
  
The way Yamato said this' made Taichi get another memory.  
  
_He was looking around at... At the place they were now! Except he was confused.   
  
He said to his lover, Matt, where are we?  
  
I don't know. But it is better than then home.  
  
Let's stay here a while, the brunette said, taking his hand.  
  
_A strange feeling came about in his head. It felt as if someone was tearing the insides of it, and yet, what would they be pulling at? Brain tissue? Than things began to make sense, and different images appeared, his memory returning. Yet, he still remembered the memory of where he has been for the past three years, but now that memory is just faded, though certain times are coming back.  
  
He looked up. he whispered, moving to the floor where Matt laid watching. Oh God, it is all my fault. This is all my fault. I can barely remember these past three years, but I know it's my fault.  
  
Matt shook his head. Shh, don't worry about it. All I'm glad for is to have you back. This past week has been horrible seeing you all mechanical like.  
  
Tai threw his hands around his boyfriend, burying his face into his neck. Let's go home. I don't care if Kari and T.K. are ashamed, I want to go home.  
  
Me too, me too!  
  
Than let's get out of here. I'm dying to play a game of soccer, and I'm craving to play with Davis and Ken, though they don't like me because of us...  
  
It doesn't matter. We can decide things when we get home. I wonder if all of our stuff is still there?  
  
Tai crinkled up his nose. How do we get home?  
  
**~**  
  
An hour later only brought them no such thing. They weren't even close. Tai made as many attempts as he could, thinking of home, wishing to go back, but nothing. So now here they sit, Tai worn out while Matt just wanting to go home.  
  
I hate this, the blonde mumbled, leaning his head on Tai.  
  
I'm sorry.  
  
Don't be. I mean, this is my fault too, he whispered, lifting his head.  
  
Tai sniffed. I wish... I wish Kari and the others would have just accepted us, you know what I mean? I can remember living this dream, this delusion for the past three years, but why? I can't seem to figure out how I could not remember my past, or anything for that matter. It was so...  
  
Matt finished.  
  
  
  
What do you think will happen?  
  
Tai turned his gaze to Matt, scrunching up his nose. What do you mean?  
  
Well how will we get home? I wonder what T.K. is up to. I wonder if they even cared we were gone.  
  
I wonder too. They hated us so much for... For being together. It hurt me so much, that's why all of this begun. It's all my fault!   
  
Matt leaned over and wiped a tear from Tai's cheek. No, it's mine too.  
  
It was my mind controlling everything! Mine! My stupid mind! Tai stood up, kicking the closest thing next to him, which happened to be a wall. I hate this!  
  
Calm down, Matt ordered, standing up. He wrapped his arms around the brunette, bringing him closer. This isn't a time to be remorsing over what could have' or if only' thoughts because that's the way life is. We all make mistakes... Maybe one of them was telling the others about us.  
  
I just was so sure they would understand, and now here we are, three years later, and what has become of us? Stuck in a stupid world that I can't even control anymore.  
  
**~**  
  
As the days rolled on, many more attempts followed, but soon, the two men began giving up. What else could they do?  
  
Tai curled up to his naked lover, relinquishing the sweet smell coming off him. This isn't so bad...  
  
Matt nodded, unable to speak from exhaustion. Yeah. We have our privacy to do _anything _we want.  
  
Yeah. I love you, Matt, love you more than anything in the world.  
  
Same here.  
  
Tai closed his eyes, feeling contest and more than anything, exhausted.   
  
  
  
_Kari was crying. She was sitting on a bed, loud sobs wracking her body. T.K. held her tightly, crying himself.  
  
I––I want Tai–– to come h––home, she sobbed, banging her fist on T.K.'s back. Bring him him, please. I need him. So much darkness, so very much darkness.  
  
T.K. tried saying something, but couldn't. Instead, he pulled Kari into a tighter hug, and cried softly.  
  
She stopped crying for a moment, pushing T.K. away. Where is he? He can't be dead, he and Matt couldn't have died! Where are they? We searched everywhere in Japan, everywhere! We should have found them––  
  
Kari, you know as well as I do that Japan may be small, but there are many people and many towns and cities. They could be anywhere and––  
  
Shut up! she screamed, her hand striking his cheek.  
  
His hand traveled to his face where it was contacted with her hand.   
  
I'm sorry, she whispered, fresh tears filling her eyes. T.K., I'm sorry.  
  
It's okay, he whispered. I want Matt to come home. I need to tell him I'm sorry, that I wasn't myself when he told me about himself and Tai. The world was so confusing... I didn't know how else to react. It's all my fault. He buried his face into his hands, weeping.  
  
Kari's arms immediately went round his body. Don't cry. Please don't... I'm sure they are fine. Maybe they are happy without us.  
  
  
  
  
_Tai bolted straight up, breathing roughly. Was that a flashback? Was that a premonition? Or was that something happening in the present, back on Earth? So many things ran through his mind, including a new determination. It was the same determination as before, the determination to get home was much stronger, though.  
  
He quickly got dressed and turned to Matt laying naked in the bed. He smiled, then shook his head. He wanted to try getting home again.  
  
This world must feed off my wishes... But for the last weeks it wasn't working. Why? he asked aloud while running downstairs. What made it stop.  
  
He ran into a room that he could have sworn was not there a minute ago. Maybe the wishes were still working? He took a seat on the floor, surrounded by three candles. The candles were dead, but suddenly, they lit. Tai's eyes grew wide.  
  
he mumbled. What a fucked up world.  
  
He closed his eyes, and concentrated, concentrated hard.   
  
**~**  
  
Matt moaned and turned over onto an empty spot. His eyes flung open, revealing an empty space beside him. Where's Tai? He quickly got dressed and fled downstairs, and found a room that he could have sworn wasn't there last night...  
  
As he entered, he found Tai sitting cross-legged surrounded by three candles that were lit. Tai didn't seem to hear him, so he began calling his name. Still, nothing.  
  
  
  
Again, nothing.  
  
Matt sat down, and in doing so, he blew out one of the candles so that it wouldn't catch onto his clothing. Suddenly Tai's eyes flickered, and strangely enough, the candle lit again. Matt just started, trying to process what he just saw. Then again, he had been seeing this kind of stuff for a few years, but that was when he was under a spell, now that he wasn't it was strange to see that.  
  
He bent down and blew the candle again, and quickly, he blew the one on the other side as well. One was still lit, but not for long. As soon as the flame went out, Tai's eyes flung open and he gasped.  
  
  
  
Tai, what's wrong?  
  
Tai frowned, quickly wrapping his arms around the blonde. Never forget that I love you, love you more than anything. For eternity I will love you, and past that.  
  
Um, so will I. What's going on? Why weren't you answering me?  
  
I was, um, asleep, he answered quickly, pulling away.  
  
Tai, tell me––  
  
It's nothing, he snapped, standing up. Come on. Let's... let's go search for some food.  
  
The pair now had to search for food, as it wouldn't appear in front of them anymore. All the while, Matt knew something was wrong, knew that Tai was hiding something from him? But what?  
  
His answer came an hour and a half later (after they ate), when he and Tai were trying to get home again. Tai didn't seem too into doing this, and Matt wondered why.  
  
Tai, what's wrong? Don't you want to get home? Kari and T.K. may have not accepted us for we are, but I think things have changed. Remember that weird letter that somehow got into this world? It's an apology.  
  
I know. Everything is fine, he stammered. He quickly looked away and sniffed.   
  
Matt could have sworn he saw something... Something that was a tear drop, at least we was sure of that. he whispered shakily. What's wrong? You haven't been yourself all morning.  
  
Nothing at all. He seemed like he was in some sort of daze. Matt hated that, he just wanted to know what was going on.  
  
Tai, what are you not telling me?  
  
I'm not going back.  
  
Confounded thoughts ran through Matt's mind. he managed to ask.  
  
You are, but I'm not.  
  
Excuse me? Since when did this become an I' thing? We're in this together, as a team. Taichi and Yamato, Tai and Matt.. What do you mean you aren't going back? We're in this together, as one.  
  
Matt, don't question me! Just... Just... He suddenly leaned forward and kissed Matt firmly, pushing him back against the couch. I need you...  
  
Matt nodded and leaned forward, kissing Tai again. His hand snaked under's Tai's shirt, tugging on the hem.  
  
As they continued to kiss, Matt felt a tear fall on his face, and he wasn't sure why, but he had tears falling too.  
  
**~**  
  
Propped on his elbow gave Tai the perfect view to look at Matt. He just started at Matt's face, the half smile that was there, the way he breathed so softly, looking somewhat content. His gaze fell lower, along Matt's naked body. This was the last time he would ever be able to do this, to look at his lover while he slept so peacefully.  
  
It hurt. He loved to watch Matt, but it hurt knowing that this is the last time, that this is it. Forever.  
  
What an awful word. Sometimes it has good meanings, like when you know you are going to spend the rest of your life with there person you love. There are side effects to that. Such as when you want to spend the rest of your life with the person you love, but there is a barrier. A barrier that will stop it forever. Forever.   
  
It was time. How would he convince Matt to leave him behind? That would be hard, but somehow he would figure it out. He quickly got dressed and made his way back to that room. Instantly the candles let.  
  
Just preform the spell and Matt will leave, he told himself quietly. Tears were streaming down his face. Would he be able to send Matt back into the real world and stay here all alone?  
  
He would have to, Matt's life depended on it, as did his.  
  
He sat in the middle of the three flaming candles and tried his best to focus his mind, not bothering to wipe the tears that came steadily down his cheeks.   
  
His mind focused on the strange dream––or day-dream––that he had before Matt interrupted it. The spell was still fresh in his mind, the key to the way home. But he couldn't go back. It was for Matt. Of course, as long as Matt didn't touch him while saying the spell, or else he himself would get transported back too, and if he did, Matt died anyway. That's why he had to do this when Matt was asleep.  
  
More tears escaped, a flashback of the strange dream he had entered his mind. He wasn't allowed to go home because if he did, it would cost him Matt's life. On the other hand, if Matt stayed, he would also end up dying anyway. At least that's what the voice told him early in the morning, the first time he sat in front of these candles.  
  
It wasn't really a spell, but more of a required thinking process. He was doing everything right when he and Matt were trying to get home, wishing it was the key, but the only thing was that he wasn't supposed to wish for the two of them together.  
  
Tai wiped away a tear sliding down his cheek and cleared his throat. He must concentrate... He must concentrate... Finally, after a few minutes, he found himself concentrating for Matt to come home.  
  
Tai! What are you doing?  
  
Oh no...  
  
  
  
Go Matt, I'm getting you home, he whispered with tears falling down his cheeks.  
  
Matt has to go home, back to Earth.  
  
Just as Tai thought that, Matt had touched his arm. Oh no. A weird vortex took them through some kind of gate, obviously the way home. Tai landed with a thud.  
  
he groaned, siting up. When Matt was no where in site, he began to call his name again. Matt! Where are you? Matt!  
  
Where was he? Tall trees surrounded him, and Tai felt like a small insect compared to the height. Great, he could be in Canada for all he knew it. But suddenly, he could hear shouting of some sort and he realized that he must not be too far away from civilization. He began to run into the direction where he could hear the voices, and coming out into a clearing, he was hoping to see Matt.  
  
Not there. Instead, a bunch of Japanese children were playing soccer in a field. Suddenly, Tai felt drops of rain in his nose, and looking up, he saw the ominous clouds overhead.  
  
Matt, where are you, he said under his breath, beginning to pick up a jog again.  
  
He ran to the opposite of the field, looking around bushes, trees, anywhere! - hoping to spot Matt somewhere. It was another fifteen minutes of hell. Fifteen minutes for Tai finally to find his love, the one he'd do anything for.  
  
That's when he remembered everything, everything about getting home. Only one was supposed to go through, and if Tai tried...  
  
His body was in a strange angle. That's the first thing the brunette noticed. Secondly, the blonde man didn't seem to be moving. At least that's what it looked like.  
  
One step closer, Tai couldn't tell yet.  
  
Another step. Still nothing.  
  
Finally, Tai ran forward and began to shake Matt forcefully, crying his name aloud. Matt! Matt! Still, nothing. Matt was limp and cold, the rain plastering his face. Tai pulled him on top of himself, wiping the blonde hair away from his face. Tai buried his face into his shoulder, crying his name over and over again, wishing he would wake up.  
  
Now Tai was in a new world, a world of loneliness.  
  
**~**  
  
Author's Notes: Again, another sad fic by me. I am really depressed lately.  
  
EXPLANATION FOR SWITCHING BETWEEN NAMES: Okay, simple reason: Tai and Matt forgot their nicknames, but when they remembered earth, they remembered their nicknames, thus, calling each other. Enough said? If not, e-mail me.  
  
I know that Kari and T.K. would never do that... But it went with the story line.  
  
Anyway, should I write another chapter on it? Or should I just leave it at this? Please review, and if you don't review, I'll take it that this story sucks and doesn't deserve another chapter. 


	2. Cut Me in Half

Disclaimer: I don't own digimon  
  
Wow it's been a long long time since this fic, huh? I just never really had any ideas for this, but now I have the conclusion finished!! Anyway, thanks for all of the encouraging reviews in the first chapter! It was everyone there who inspired me!!  
  
  
Taichi's Dream World  
Cut Me in Half  
by: Sapphire Goddess  
  
  
Tai spotted Matt and held back a scream as he ran over to his crumpled up body. Matt! Matt! he yelled, sliding down beside him.  
  
The rain plastered Matt's hair to his face. God only knows how long he had been laying there for. Tai pulled Matt on top of himself, hugging him closely to his chest and wiping the blonde hair away from his face. Tai buried his face into his shoulder, crying his name over and over again, wishing he would wake up.   
  
Now Tai was in a new world. A world of loneliness.  
  
**~**  
  
The clock ticked away steadily. More seconds of his life gone with each tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. The noise began to get to him, so he pulled the covers over his head. He didn't want there to be any noise, any light, no people - he wanted to be completely alone.  
  
It wasn't really his choice. It was his fault, yes, but he didn't have a choice anymore. His precious Matt was gone. He was never coming back.  
  
They buried him last week. Tai couldn't really remember the funeral. He didn't really want to. TK looked upon him with such a disgusted face, as if them being gay was really the fault of his death.  
  
However, in a way it was.  
  
The stupid spell faltered. If only it worked. Matt wasn't supposed to come though. He wasn't supposed to touch Tai's shoulder and get him sent back too. That wasn't the plan! Tai was still supposed to be in that fucked up world and Matt was supposed to be here on earth.  
  
Then again, no matter what they would still have been alone. No matter what, Tai was never going to see his precious Matt again either way.  
  
But still, if the spell had worked, he would have known that Matt would be safe. Knowing that Matt would be safe and happy was all that mattered.  
  
Oh what was he saying? Like Matt would be happy. They were soul mates, and all because of himself, he and Matt got transported into that stupid, perfect world.   
  
But then, could he place Matt's death on TK and Kari? They were the ones who rejected them being together. It was them who caused Tai to wish that they were in another alone alone together.  
  
Who am I kidding? he asked himself, pulling the covers off his head. It's my fault. Matt's dead because of me.  
  
He began to cry again until he felt a hand rub his back. He lifted his head; no face expression showed on his face at who he saw.  
  
Don't look at me that way. You know I don't like you at the moment, but you're still a Digidestined and _his_ boyfriend.  
  
Tai sniffed and sat up. I know that.  
  
TK shrugged and sat on the be next to him. I heard you admit that it was your fault. So want to explain what _really_ happened?  
  
TK didn't believe Tai's story about the Dream World. Tai didn't really blame him, considering it seemed a bit farfetched.  
  
I'm not lying about the Dream World, TK. It really happened! Ask Matt he... Tai choked up when he realized that Matt was never going to be asked another question again. No one would ever hear that amazing voice again. Never ever...  
  
TK slapped his cheek, but not hard. Don't faint on me now! I just want to understand what happened to my brother! That's all!  
  
I told you the story already. When you guys rejected us, I wished that we were somewhere else alone together and suddenly we were there. But then slowly we forgot about who we were. Until one day, when we both saw you and Kari in dreams crying over us. That's when we began to remember who we were. I learned of a spell that would bring us back, but we couldn't go back together. Matt wasn't supposed to touch me during the spell, or it would send me back to... and the result of that was his... his...  
  
  
  
Tai nodded, looking up to see TK's face expression. He had already told TK this story, but this time he told it in greater detail.  
  
I... you saw me and Kari crying in a dream?  
  
Tai nodded. Matt turned back to his old self first, and then he helped me through it too.  
  
TK bit his lip. I just find this so hard to believe...  
  
I know it's hard! But you have to believe me! I never wanted to hurt Matt! Ever! I loved - love - him  
  
TK was deep in thought for a moment before he snarled and stood up. You are such a liar, Taichi Yagami! I hate you! You killed my brother! Stay the hell away from me, Kari and the other Digidestined! You are not one of us!  
  
As soon as TK bolted from the room, Tai began to sob again.   
  
_You are not one of us. _TK's words echoed through his mind, and he had the feeling they would always echo through his mind.  
  
**~**  
  
He was alone again. Now it's been two weeks since Matt's funeral. Tai hasn't left his apartment. Well, it wasn't even his. An old high school friend happened to find him in the park that night with Matt and offered to give him the place while he went on holidays for a month.  
  
Tai only ate once a day, but when the food in the house began to run low, he didn't really care. Maybe if he stopped eating, he would die and Matt would be his again...  
  
He slapped his forehead. What if Matt came back to life? He couldn't be dead and Matt alive.  
  
He slapped his forehead once again. Matt was never going to be alive.  
  
What decisions to make. If only there were two of him to help him decide.  
  
**~**  
  
It's been three weeks. His friend would be home in a week. His friend expected him to be out in his own apartment in a week.  
  
Dragging himself out of bed, he went into the kitchen. His stomach growled for not eating in two days. He felt a little weak and if he was going to search for an apartment, he needed to eat something.  
  
He opened his fridge, not really expecting anything o be in there, but for some reason there was a tomato. Just one tomato. His eyebrow raised but he took it out anyway. TK must have left it for him when he came by yesterday (he supposedly forgot an important key the day he had come earlier).   
  
He took it out and placed it on the counter. Then he grabbed a knife. He sliced one thin slice. Cutting the tomato reminded him of Matt. Matt had always been a good cook. He would have been much better at cutting this. Matt was perfect at doing things like that. Matt was perfect in every way.   
  
He was just about cutting the middle of the tomato when the phone rang, causing the knife to slip and draw a big cut along his palm, just above his wrist. He didn't do anything about it. Just stared at it. Watched the blood flow along his palm, making his hand red. So red... Matt wasn't bloody when he died. No blood came from Matt. Maybe Tai would die the opposite...  
  
The phone finally stopped ringing and the caller began leaving a message.  
  
Yuuta! I know your on holidays, but call me back later. I'd love for us to get together. It's me, Liz. You know you want me. Let's hook up later. You also better have gotten me the perfect present! Call me back.  
  
At the word perfect, an image of Matt came into his head. The image stayed for a moment, but something replaced it.  
  
Matt's voice was calling him. He was whispering Tai's name over and over again. The blood still poured from his hand and the brunette fell to the floor, beginning to sob at the sound of Matt's voice.  
  
It was nice though, to hear his voice. It was lulling Tai to sleep... from all the loneliness, heartache and feelings of failure. Maybe he was dying. Tai wasn't sure. He didn't care. He continued to listen to Matt's voice, but after a few minutes of the whispering, it seemed to get louder. Matt was now screaming his name! Or maybe it was just the echo, but nevertheless, Tai was trying to shake the voice out of his head.   
  
He wished it away, over and over again. The voice pounded into his mind. Over and over again.  
  
His eyes shot open, but instead of seeing his friend's apartment, he was peering into crystal blue eyes.   
  
Am I dead?  
  
Matt laughed softly, brushing hair out of Tai's eyes. No silly. Did sex really wear you out _that _much?  
  
Tai's brows frowned in confusion. What was Matt talking about? Them just having sex? Huh? He was dead... dead...  
  
He sat up, the covers falling onto his lap. He and Matt were both naked in the bed. Matt also sat up.  
  
Is something wrong? I know yesterday was a bit... hard, but we should just forget about TK and Kari. We should just matter and our happiness. Hey come on, you told me this all night and after... we had sex I just thought I'd say it since you seem to be a bit upset by it now.  
  
Tai remembered telling Matt that the night they had sex, just before they were transported to the Dream World.   
  
Was that all a dream? Was it a dream he had about being in the Dream World and Matt dying? But it felt so real, so vivid... Surely it couldn't have been all a dream. Matt didn't seem to remember because he was stroking Tai's cheek.  
  
Maybe none of it had really happened. It was just an awful, horrible dream. A horrible dream that seemed to be three years of his life.  
  
Say something, would you? You're normally the talkative one.  
  
Tai smiled and closed the gap between his and Matt's lips. Nothing felt better than having Matt's lips against his own. When he pulled away, both were smiling.  
  
I'm so glad you're alive.  
  
Matt laughed. Well I'm glad I'm alive too. I don't know why I would be dead, but hey, whatever floats your boat.  
  
Tai smiled and kissed him again. So, Matt didn't remember any of it. It had to have been a dream. But then again, he did say one last wish, for the voice in his head to go away... Maybe he got one more wish? Even if it had been real, Tai wasn't about to tell Matt any of it. After all, they had their lives to live together. There was no need to drag the past in.  
  
THE END  



End file.
